Want to buy my books? What an excellent idea. Probably the best idea you have had this year. But where to buy? The traditional place would be a bookshop. You could try your local butcher, but trust me, you’ll come out empty-handed. However - help is at hand! There is a new way to purchase books! You can now buy books on a new invention called the ‘inter-net’.

Buy ALEX VS AXEL: THE IMPOSSIBLE QUESTS from WATERSTONES, AMAZON or YOUR LOCAL INDEPENDENT BOOKSHOP

Buy CHARLIE CHANGES INTO A CHICKEN from WATERSTONES, AMAZON, YOUR LOCAL INDEPENDENT BOOKSHOP or WH SMITH.

Buy CHARLIE TURNS INTO A T-REX from WATERSTONES, AMAZON, YOUR LOCAL INDEPENDENT BOOKSHOP or WH SMITH

Buy CHARLIE MORPHS INTO A MAMMOTH from WATERSTONES, AMAZON, YOUR LOCAL INDEPENDENT BOOKSHOP or WH SMITH

Buy UMA AND THE ANSWER TO ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING from WATERSTONES, AMAZON, YOUR LOCAL INDEPENDENT BOOKSHOP or WH SMITH

Buy GRETA AND THE GHOST HUNTERS from WATERSTONES, AMAZON, YOUR LOCAL INDEPENDENT BOOKSHOP or WH SMITH

Buy THE UNDERPANTS OF CHAOS from WATERSTONES, AMAZON, YOUR LOCAL INDEPENDENT BOOKSHOP or WH SMITH

If you don’t have your own credit card and you need permission from a parent, go get them now. Start screaming very, very loudly until they agree to buy at least one book. That’s right - don’t stop. They will buckle soon.